Total Health in Midlife Episode #201: How to Stop Overeating Without Dieting

Are you tired of feeling like you’re constantly at war with food? Or do you find yourself overeating even when you’re not hungry, and then feeling guilty afterwards? Now, what if I told you that there’s a way to enjoy all your favorite foods? Maintain a healthy weight, and never diet again.

In today’s episode, I’m going to reveal the secret to eating just enough, not too much. It’s a skill that’s transformed my life and has helped countless clients break free from the cycle of dieting and overeating. You will discover why diets have been setting you up for failure and why willpower isn’t the answer. I’ll share a simple tool that can help you tune in to your body’s true needs and show you how to navigate tricky social situations without derailing your health goals.

Now, if you’ve ever felt hopeless about your eating habits if you’re tired of the constant battle with food. This episode could be the wakeup call that you’ve been waiting for. Stay tuned to find out how you can transform your relationship with food and reclaim control over your eating without giving up the foods that you love. This could be the last piece of the puzzle that you need to finally achieve lasting health and happiness. Don’t miss it.

Welcome to Total Health and Midlife, the podcast for women embracing the pivotal transformation from the daily grind to the dawn of a new chapter. I’m Elizabeth, your host and fellow traveler on this journey.

As a Life and Health Coach, I am intimately familiar with the changes and challenges we face during this stage. Shifting careers, changing relationships, our new bodies, and redefining goals and needs as we start to look to the future and ask, what do I want?

In this podcast, we’ll explore physical, mental, and emotional wellness, offering insights and strategies to achieve optimal health through these transformative years.

Yes, it’s totally possible.

Join me in this amazing journey of body, mind, and spirit, where we’re not just improving our health, but transforming our entire lives.

Hey everyone, welcome to the Total Health in Midlife Podcast. I am your host, Elizabeth Sherman. And today, we are exploring a crucial skill for your health. It’s called ‘Eating Just Enough, Not Too Much.’ Now, this is the seventh habit in my series on the ‘Eight Basic Habits that Healthy People Do.’ And it’s truly Transformative.

So, let me share a quick story. Years ago, I was at a party talking to a friend about my constant struggle with food. I felt totally lost about what I should eat and how to control myself around sugar. Another friend chimed in who was sitting there just observing us and she said, ‘oh that’s really interesting, I just listen to my body.’

Now, I remember at the time thinking that she was being a total jerk. I had no idea what she meant. Like, what does that even mean? How do you listen to your body? No one had ever taught me that. It just didn’t make any sense to me.

Now, I understand that we’ve been conditioned to ignore our body’s wisdom. Diets dictate how many calories to eat, when to eat, and what to eat. They teach us to override our hunger signals, to drink water when we’re hungry, to follow arbitrary rules instead of our own internal cues.

This habit of eating just enough is about tuning into your body’s signals and genuinely wanting to feel good. It’s about understanding true hunger and satisfaction. Contrary to what you might think, it’s not about deprivation. It’s about finding that balance where you’re nourished and satisfied without feeling uncomfortably full or feeling the guilt of treating yourself.

Mastering this habit completely changed my relationship with food and my body. I’ve learned to appreciate and savor each bite, getting more enjoyment from eating less. It’s the key to managing your weight without restrictive diets, to feeling good in your body, and to finally break free from the cycle of overeating and guilt.

So, let’s talk first about a common struggle that many women face. Not really knowing what satisfaction or hunger feels like when it comes to your eating. You might be thinking, ‘what? Of course, I know when I’m satisfied.’ But here’s the thing. Many of us eat because it’s time to eat, or because others are eating, or we stop eating because the food is gone. We don’t actually tune into our body’s signals of satisfaction.

I see this all the time with my clients. They tell me that they finish a meal and feel fine, but then 30 minutes later, they suddenly realize that they’re uncomfortably full. Or they’ll snack mindlessly while watching TV, not even tasting the food. Let alone noticing if they’re satisfied. Does that sound familiar? I know that it does for me.

This disconnect often stems from years of dieting and ignoring our body’s natural cues. I mean, think about it. How many diets have you been on that told you exactly what and when to eat, regardless of whether you were hungry or not? How many times have you pushed through feeling that hunger because it wasn’t quote unquote time to eat yet? Or forced yourself to finish everything on your plate because that’s what the diet plan said.

These experiences train us to override our body’s signals. We learn to ignore hunger, push past fullness, and eat according to external rules rather than our own internal wisdom. It’s like we’re walking around as bodiless heads, finding our physical needs inconvenient. We get annoyed when we need water. When we have to use the bathroom or if we feel tired. We’ve lost touch with the basic signals our body is sending to us.

The problem is that when we don’t know what to look for, what hunger feels like, or what enough feels like, we often end up overeating. We eat more than we need. Or we undereat and then binge later because we’re ravenous. Neither scenario feels good, and both can lead to weight gain and a stressful relationship with food.

But here’s the good news. This connection to your body can be re learned. It’s a skill just like any other. And once you master it, you’ll find it so much easier to maintain a healthy weight without constantly thinking about food, without logging anything, without doing all of that stuff that we are taught to do and feeling deprived as a result. You’ll be able to enjoy all foods in the right amounts for your body without guilt or stress.

We’re going to dive into how you can start reconnecting with your body’s signals of hunger and satisfaction. But for now, I want you to know that if you’ve been struggling with this, you’re not alone. And more importantly, that this is a learnable skill.

Alright. So, let’s dive in to understanding the difference between hunger, satisfaction, and fullness. This is where the real stuff happens. First, let’s talk about a tool that I use with my clients called ‘Body Scans’. Now, these are your secret weapon in reconnecting with your body’s signals.

A body scan is simply taking a moment to check in with how your body feels from head to toe. It’s about noticing any sensations, tensions, or feelings without judgment. When it comes to hunger and fullness, body scans are crucial. They help you to tune in to what hunger actually feels like in your body. Is it annoying in your stomach? Is it lightheadedness? Irritability? Everyone experiences hunger differently. And body scans help you to identify your unique signals.

Once you can start to pay attention to your body, then the next thing that we want to do is start to plot those points on what’s called the hunger scale. The hunger scale is a 20 point scale from negative 10 to 0, and then to positive 10. Where negative 10 is starving, and positive 10 is so uncomfortably overfull.

Ideally, we want to eat when we’re at about a negative 4, definitely hungry, but not ravenous. And we want to stop eating at about a positive 2. You could eat more, but you know that if you stopped, you’d be okay. This scale gives you a practical way to gauge your hunger and fullness levels.

Now, one thing I need to address is that we don’t like to be hungry as people. As humans, we hate to be hungry. Many of us fear hunger and see it as an emergency. We eat preemptively because we’re scared of getting too hungry. But here’s the thing. I don’t want you to get super hungry. I just want you to understand what hunger feels like for you, so that you can predict it, and understand what the different levels of hunger feel like for you.

It’s similar to an emotion. It comes and it goes in waves and the more you can feel it at a low level, the better you can manage it. Learning to tolerate mild hunger is not only about building trust with yourself. But if your goal is weight loss and you give your body food every single time that it signals that it’s hungry, your body isn’t going to burn body fat for fuel. And instead, it’s going to use the food that’s in your stomach for fuel.

Keep in mind that the goal isn’t to be hungry all the time. It’s to understand your hunger so that you can respond to it appropriately. It’s about eating when you’re hungry, not just because it’s time to eat or because you’re bored or stressed. By using body scans and the hunger scale, you’ll start to recognize your body’s subtle cues. You’ll learn to distinguish between true hunger and other urges to eat.

This awareness is the foundation of eating just enough and not too much. This skill takes practice, but it’s absolutely learnable. And once you master it, you’ll find a new sense of freedom around food. You’ll be able to enjoy all foods without guilt because you’ll know how to listen to your body and give it what it truly needs.

When I first started learning how to eat just enough, I had no idea what I was doing. I’d spent years following diets that told me exactly what and when to eat, completely disconnecting me from my body’s natural signals. Learning to reconnect was a challenge to say the least. It took me a solid 18 months to really get a handle on eating just enough.

Now, that might sound like a long time. But remember, I was unlearning decades of habits and beliefs about food. I had to relearn how to interpret my body signal. Understand what true hunger and satisfaction felt like. And trust myself around food.

During this process, I made plenty of mistakes. I overate, I underate, I misinterpreted signals. But each misstep was a learning opportunity for me. I started to notice patterns, like how certain foods affected my energy levels. Or how stress impacted my hunger cues. Slowly but surely, I began to trust myself and my body more.

One of the biggest challenges was learning to be okay with not being stuffed after a meal. For so long, I equated fullness with satisfaction. Learning to stop eating when I was satisfied, not full, felt strange and even, I had some grief at first. It was like saying goodbye to an old, familiar feeling.

But here’s the thing. While my journey took 18 months, it doesn’t have to take that long for you. This is where coaching comes in. As a coach, I’ve developed strategies and tools to help my clients accelerate this learning process. Through coaching, you get personalized guidance tailored to your unique challenges and eating patterns. You have someone to prepare for you what to expect and how to interpret your body’s signals, navigate tricky situations, and provide accountability.

As your coach, I can help you identify and work through the emotional aspects of eating that often trips us up. Moreover, coaching provides a structured approach to learning this skill. Instead of figuring it out through trial and error like I did, you get a clear roadmap. You learn specific techniques for doing body scans. Using the hunger scale effectively and managing challenging situations like social events or stress eating.

Perhaps most importantly, a coach offers support and encouragement throughout this process. Learning to eat just enough can be emotionally challenging at times. And having someone in your corner can make all the difference in the world. While my journey took 18 months, many of my clients start seeing significant changes within weeks or months.

The key is consistent practice and the right guidance. Keep in mind that eating just enough is a skill, and just like any skill, it can be learned faster and more effectively with the right teacher. Mastering the habit of eating just enough, not too much, comes with a host of benefits that extend far beyond just managing your weight.

Let’s talk about how this skill can transform your overall health and well-being. First off, your digestion will thank you. When you’re not overloading your system with more food than it needs, your digestive tract can function more efficiently.

Many of my clients report fewer issues with bloating, gas, and indigestion once they start eating just enough. It’s like giving your body a break. It can focus on properly processing the food that you’ve eaten, rather than struggling to handle excess.

Sleep is another area where you’ll likely see improvements. Overeating, especially late at night, can disrupt your sleep patterns. When you eat just enough, you’re more likely to sleep soundly and wake up feeling refreshed, not sluggish, from a too full stomach.

Beyond these specific benefits, many people experience an overall boost in energy and well-being. When you’re not dealing with the discomfort of overeating or the energy crash that often follows, you’re free to focus on other aspects of your life. You might find that you have more energy for exercise, hobbies, or spending time with those people that you actually like in your life.

But perhaps one of the most liberating benefits is the ability to eat normally without having a diet to follow. Once you master this habit, you can enjoy all foods in moderation. There’s no need for strict meal plans or avoiding entire food groups. You can go out to restaurants, enjoy social events, and even indulge in treats without guilt or fear of derailing your health goals.

This habit gives you the freedom to enjoy food while still taking care of your body. It’s not about deprivation. It’s about finding that sweet spot where you’re satisfied and nourished, but not uncomfortably full. And that’s a game changer for you and your relationship with food, and your overall quality of life.

So, let’s talk about some of the common challenges that you might face when learning to eat just enough, and how to overcome them. So, two big ones that come up frequently are the fear of hunger and navigating social situations or family meals.

First, let’s address the fear of hunger. So many of us have been conditioned to see hunger as something to be avoided at all costs. We eat preemptively, worried that if we don’t will end up like so super hungry and out of control. But here’s the thing, hunger is not an emergency. It’s a natural bodily signal, just like feeling tired or needing to use the bathroom.

To overcome this fear, you want to start by allowing yourself to experience mild hunger. So, use your body scans and hunger scale to identify what different levels of hunger feel like for you. You might be surprised to find out that mild hunger is not as uncomfortable or urgent as you thought it was.

Remember, you’re not aiming to be starving. We just want to recognize and respond appropriately to your body’s signal. Another helpful strategy is to always have a plan. Know what your next meal or snack will be so that you can reassure yourself that food is coming. This can help ease anxiety about hunger and prevent panic eating.

Now, let’s talk about social situations and family meals. These can be tricky because there’s often pressure to eat more than you need. Or to eat at times when you’re actually not hungry. The key here is to be prepared and to communicate clearly.

Before going to a social event or a family meal, do a body scan and check your hunger levels. If you know that you’ll be eating soon, but you aren’t hungry yet, consider having a smaller portion than you normally would. You can always have more if you’re hungry later.

Food is not scarce. Don’t be afraid to politely decline food if you’re not hungry. You can say something like, everything looks so delicious. But you know, I’m not super hungry right now. I’ll have some later if I feel hungry. Now, most people will respect your choice if you’re clear and confident about it.

For family meals, try to involve your family in your process. Explain what you’re doing and why it’s important to you. You might even inspire them to pay more attention to their own hunger and fullness cues. If you do overeat in social situations, and it happens to all of us sometimes. Don’t beat yourself up. Use it as a learning experience.

What triggered the overeating? How did you feel afterwards? This information can help you make different choices next time. Don’t forget that mastering this habit is a process. It’s not linear. Be patient with yourself as you navigate these challenges. And with practice and persistence, eating just enough will become more natural, even in tricky social situations.

I want to share a success story that truly illustrates how transformative this habit can be. My client, Sarah, came to me frustrated with constant dieting and overeating cycles. She felt out of control around food and was always either strictly following a diet or completely off the rails. We started working on the habit of eating just enough, not too much.

Now at first, Sarah was skeptical. She couldn’t imagine eating without strict rules or stopping before she felt stuffed, especially when it came to treats. But she committed to practicing body scans and using the hunger scale. The turning point came about two months into our work together. Sarah called me so super excited to share her breakthrough.

She had been at a family dinner, typically, a trigger for overeating. But this time, she tuned into her body. She ate slowly. She was enjoying her food. And to her surprise, she naturally stopped when she felt satisfied, not stuffed. What amazed Sarah was how good she felt, both physically and emotionally.

She wasn’t uncomfortably full, and she didn’t feel guilty for eating what she did. She realized that she had enjoyed the meal more because she was present and attentive to her body’s signals. From that point on, Sarah’s relationship with food began to change dramatically. She started trusting her body more and more.

The constant thoughts about food and weight began to fade. And she found that she could enjoy all foods without binging because she knew that she could have them again when she was hungry.

Six months later, Sarah had not only lost weight, but more importantly, she had gained a sense of peace and control around food that she had never experienced before. Sarah’s story shows that this habit is absolutely achievable. It takes practice and patience, but the results can be life changing. And if Sarah can do it, so can you.

As we approach the end of the year, I want to invite you to consider making eating just enough, not too much, a goal for next year. This isn’t about restrictive dieting or depriving yourself. It’s about developing a skill that will serve you for life. The ability to truly listen to your body and give it exactly what it needs.

Imagine starting the new year with a fresh approach to food and eating. No more guilt, no more obsessing over calories, no more yoyo dieting, just a peaceful, balanced relationship with food that allows you to maintain a healthy weight without that constant struggle.

If you’re tired of knowing what to do, but not being able to do it consistently. I want to help. I’m offering a special, ‘I Know What to Do, I’m just Not Doing It’ strategy call. During this call, we’ll dive deep into your specific challenges with eating and create a personalized plan to help you master this habit.

This isn’t about quick fixes, or one size fits all solutions. It’s about understanding your unique needs and patterns and developing strategies that work for you. We’ll discuss how to implement body scans and the hunger scale with your daily life. How to navigate challenging situations, and how to build trust with yourself around food.

To book your strategy call, go to elizabethsherman.com/call, and don’t let another year go by struggling with the same eating issues. Take this step towards a healthier, happier relationship with food and your body. Remember, that eating just enough is a learnable skill, and with the right guidance, you can master it faster than you might think.

So, as I wrap up today’s episode, I want to recap the key points that we’ve covered. I talked about the importance of reconnecting with your body’s signals of hunger and fullness. I introduced the concept of body scans and the hunger scale as practical tools to help you to eat just enough, not too much.

And I addressed the fear of hunger and how to navigate social eating situations. Keep in mind that this habit isn’t about restriction or deprivation. It’s about learning to trust your body and give it exactly what it needs. It’s about finding freedom in your relationship with food, where you can enjoy all foods without guilt or fear.

Mastering this habit takes time and practice. But it’s absolutely achievable. Just like myself and my client Sarah, you too can transform your relationship with food and find peace around eating.

As you move forward, be patient and kind to yourself. Every meal is an opportunity to practice and learn. Trust the process and trust your body. You have the innate wisdom to know how much food you need. It’s just a matter of tuning back into that wisdom.

So, here’s to your health, to eating just enough, and to a new year filled with a peaceful, balanced approach to food. That’s all I have for you today. Have an amazing day. I’ll talk to you next time. Bye-bye.

Thank you for tuning in today. Now, if you enjoy the podcast and are ready to take the next step in addressing your health concerns, I would love to invite you to schedule an I Know What To Do, I’m Just Not Doing It strategy call.

In this 60 minute session, we will explore what’s holding you back and create a personalized action plan. You will gain clarity, support, and practical steps to move you forward. Visit elizabethsherman.com/call to book your call now. You can transform your health and I would love to be there to help.