Done with Dieting Episode #95: What Are You Willing To Do?

We know that weight loss isn’t linear, and that in order to change our results, we’re going to have to do things differently than we’ve done them before. We’re going to have to get uncomfortable, but at some point, we’re all going to have limits on what we are willing and not willing to do long term.

On today’s podcast, I’m talking about. The threshold that each of us must confront when we’re on our journey to better health habits and how to determine the stopping point. Let’s get started.

You are listening to the done with dieting podcast. The podcast for women in midlife, who are done with dieting, but still want to lose weight and feel good in your clothes.

You know that diets don’t work long term. But you feel like there’s this secret that everyone else knows that you just haven’t figured it out yet.

I am your host, Elizabeth Sherman. And I’ve helped hundreds of women get off the diet roller coaster, change their relationship with food, exercise, and their bodies.

Through this podcast, my goal is to help you too.

Welcome. Let’s get started.

Hey everyone, welcome to the Done with Dieting podcast episode number 95. We are nearing our 100th episode, and I have some really exciting things planned. And because it’s going to be a stretch for me, it’s going to be a very vulnerable kind of few episodes.

I’m feeling a little nervous about it, so you’re going to have to tune in in a few weeks and see what I have planned for you.

But today, I just finished the sugar cravings reset. And I have to tell you that this sugar cravings reset, it was a five day reset of your sugar cravings. And so, I had a small group of women come through, and I have to tell you that it was freaking amazing. Like the ‘ahas’ and the breakthroughs that they had every single day were so incredibly just inspiring.

I woke up every day just so excited to share the information. And so, if you missed it, it’s okay, we’re going to be doing it again in January. And in this reset, what you’re going to do is you are going to understand why you have cravings.

So, I’m actually getting into the physiology behind why we have cravings. What we can do about it. How to set up your environment so that your cravings are fewer. And then, what are some of the things that you will want to look at, so that you don’t self-sabotage. Because we all do this, right? We all know how to adopt the habits that we have, and then something comes along and we’re like, Oh my gosh, I totally self-sabotaged. So, why does that happen?

In the sugar cravings reset, I’m actually going into it. You’ll actually see as clear as day, you’ll be able to connect the dots and see, oh yeah, that’s why I do that.

So anyway, we’re going to do it in January, and if you go to elizabethsherman.com/sugar, you can actually sign up for the wait list. So, I’ll have a wait list, it’s $15 US to join. It’s going to be worth every single penny because you’re going to make that money back in all of the sugar that you’re not going to eat.

Right now, we are just about to hit Thanksgiving. And so, Sugar Fest is going to start. So, if you find that within the next few weeks, during Christmas and Thanksgiving that you’re just eating a little bit more sugar than you want to be, make sure that you sign up for the sugar cravings reset. It’s going to be amazing because this last one was amazing, and I have testimonials to prove it. So, that’s all I have for that.

The other thing that I wanted to ask of you is if you’ve been enjoying the podcast, I would be so grateful to you if you left me a rating and review. Because ratings and reviews are really super important when it comes to the podcast because the more ratings and reviews, I have, the more people I can help. Because then, Apple will promote this podcast for other people, and it doesn’t cost anything. Just hit that five stars if you like it, and I would love to hear your feedback. So, if you wouldn’t mind, leave me a rating and review, I would so appreciate it. Because then, I can help more women just like you.

All right. So, today on the podcast, what we are talking about is weight loss. And I know that I don’t talk about weight loss a lot. I mean, I talk about it in some respects. But what I want to talk about today is kind of plateaus and what our expectations are of our bodies when we start a new program. So, what we need to do though is we need to back up. And we need to start out by addressing the fact that the reason that we are generally, the weight that we are is because of our habits. It’s because of the things that we’ve been doing in order to maintain our metabolism, right?

Now, there are a few caveats to that statement. And those caveats are, there’s a lot of research just recently come out, that points to childhood trauma is actually one of the indicators, the risk factors of being an overweight or obese adult.

And so, be aware that if you’re like, but Elizabeth, I don’t eat that much. Yeah, I know there’s a couple different reasons why you might be the size that you are, and one of them could be because of childhood trauma. So, anything that was traumatic that happened in your childhood. But also, genetics. How our families are, the shape that our families are, our family tree. Those will also impact what we look like as we grow up. So, if you see your family in photos, chances are that you look, you have the similar body style to other people within your family.

And then, there’s also the idea of what’s called set point. And set point is that our bodies like to be at homeostasis. So, if we eat enough calories for us to be at let’s say, 200 pounds, and we do that for a period of time, our body gets used to being at 200 pounds. And so, when we reduce calorie, what happens is our body feels really uncomfortable with that. And so, it will do anything that it can to go back to the 200 pounds.

Now, there is evidence to suggest that we can change our set point. And so, if you do get down to let’s say, 150 pounds. Staying there for a period of time, it may be a little rough for a while but once you get there, then your body will try to stay there even if you eat an excess of calories. So, your body will try to stay at the same number, at the same weight, regardless of your energy input and output. Okay.

The statement that I made was the reason that we are, the size that we are is because of our habits. And just being aware, I just wanted to point out that there are a few caveats or reasons why that may or may not be true. Okay. Now, our actions create our results.

And so, what I see happening with a lot of folks, a lot of clients that come to me, or folks that I see on social media is this one common misperception which is if I eat like this, then start losing weight. If I continue to eat like I’m eating and exercise like I’m exercising, I will continue to lose weight as long as I don’t change anything. And that is actually incorrect. If there’s one thing that we know, it’s that when we start to lose weight, we will all, all of us run into or encounter a plateau.

And this is one of the reasons why I love when I work with clients, I love the idea of doing the bare minimum. What is the low hanging fruit that I can change? What are the easiest habits that I can change that will create the most results.

And so, there’s Precision Nutrition is an organization that I’m certified through, and they have this beautiful saying which says, the strategy that you use to lose the first 10 pounds is not the same strategy that you will use to lose the last 10 pounds.

And I think that it’s really important for us to understand that. That when we are initially losing weight, it’s going to get significantly more difficult, the leaner we get. And so, why the thinking is flawed that if I eat this and I start losing weight, if I continue to eat just that number of calories and exercise the same way and don’t change anything, that I will continue.

And the reason why this is flawed logic is that a smaller body, needs fewer calories than larger bodies. And this is one reason why one of the methods that I teach with my clients is using your hand, using your body as a tool for measuring how much you should be eating. Because then people with bigger bodies get to eat more food. And people with smaller bodies eat less food. It works really, really well.

And that way, we’re not actually logging food either. You’re just kind of eyeballing your food and saying, how much is that chicken? Is it a palm size? Is it two palm sizes? How many vegetables do I have on my plate? Is it one fist? Is it two fists? You know, things like that. And so, that’s how we look at what we should be eating.

And I think that when we start out and we start to lose weight, many of my clients come to me and they say, I just don’t want to think about it. That’s the biggest thing. Not only do I not want to think about what I’m eating, but I don’t want to beat myself up for eating treats, or eating the wrong things, or whatever it is. I just want to not put so much energy into my body, into my body image, into what it is that I’m planning.

And so, I think what happens is we all want to get to a point where our eating and exercising becomes just effortless. Right? That it isn’t a chore anymore.

I created an Instagram reel a few months ago, and it actually has done really well. And what it is it’s of me drawing a graph. And on the left hand side, I have written happiness. And at the bottom, I have written strictness of diet.

If the happiness grade is zero on the bottom and 10 at the top. So, ultimate happiness at the top. Along the strictness of our diet, there seems to be an inverse relationship between the happiness that we have in general, as well as with our bodies and that is a tradeoff of the strictness that we have. Within our diet and just our exercise habits and all of our health type habits.

When I mean by that is that as my strictness goes up, the strictness of the foods that I’m eating, and planning, and preparing and getting rid of treat foods. As that strictness goes along the scale, my level of happiness with my diet goes down. Now, my level of happiness with my body may go up. And so, there’s this weird relationship between the happiness that we have in our eating and our happiness with our body.

And so, why I wanted to bring this up today is because at some point, it’s just not going to be worth it anymore. It’s not going to be worth it to continue to get more and more strict. So, I have a story to illustrate this point.

In recent episodes, I’ve talked about how I have been greatly reducing my alcohol intake. And what’s really been interesting to me with that process is even though, I didn’t really drink that much before, I didn’t think I was drinking too much alcohol before. Right now, I’m drinking significantly less, and I’ve noticed a change in my body.

The other morning, I was exercising and when I was exercising, the thought occurred to me, huh, I wonder if I could actually get a little bit leaner. I wonder if I could get a little bit stronger and what that would look like. Because you know, it might be nice to do that just because I want to. And then, I immediately started thinking about, okay, so we could do that.

But if I did that, then I would really have to dedicate myself to working out a little bit more. I’d probably have to buy some workout equipment because I don’t belong to a gym right now, which is fine. I actually kind of want to do that. But do I actually want to put in the effort to lifting heavy weights? And now, that I’m almost 54, do I want to put that stress on my joints? And then, the other thing that hit me was what would I need to do in my diet in order to lose more fat?

And so, when we are on our path to weight loss and getting to our ideal size and shape. What happens is as we go through and we make changes to our diet, there are going to be changes to your diet that are going to be really easy for you to implement, that are going to make drastic change in your physique. And then, there are going to be changes that might be a little bit more difficult to make but will also pay off as far as your physique goes.

There’s going to come a time that low hanging fruit, there isn’t as much of it. And so, we get to decide how much we are willing to be uncomfortable in our eating and in our exercise habits, in order to get to the body shape that we desire.

And here’s where coaching comes in. Because we may not be willing to do everything that we want in order to get to the shape and size that we want to be. But it doesn’t make any sense whatsoever that if I’m not willing to make those quote unquote sacrifices in my diet and in my exercise. That I am going to be resentful of my body that it’s not doing what I think it should be doing, that I’m not willing to be more strict.

And be aware that while I’m saying this, I realize that everyone has their own comfort level with what they’re willing to do and not do nutritionally, in order to get their results. And so, there’s this continuum of how much do I want to back away from eating sweets, or drinking wine, or whatever it is overeating. The question is how much do I want to give up in order to get the body that I desire?

Now, here’s what we want to do on the other side. If you’re not willing to go all the way to being super strict and only eating vegetables, and only eating protein, and not having anything fried, and never eating anything sweet, and only having alcohol like once in a blue moon. If you are unwilling to do all of those things in order to get the body that you desire, what we want to do is we want to then coach you on the body that you have. Because there’s no reason why we should go through life, hating on our bodies because our body doesn’t look like we think that it should.

And so, there’s a meeting between the two sides that what we want to do is we want to do everything that we can do nutritionally and exercise wise, lifestyle wise, in order to get you to a place where you feel comfortable with what it is that you’re doing for your body. Develop the habits that you want.

And then, on the other side of that, what we’re going to do is we’re going to help you to love your body as it is because it’s the only body you have and none of us want to go to our deathbed thinking bad things about our body when your body is just fine.

And so, when we can get to a place of you know what? This is as good as it’s going to get, and I’m okay with that. That’s when we’ve reached Nirvana. That’s when we’ve gotten to the point where we say, you know what? My body is good and I’m happy with it.

So, what this episode is about is asking yourself, when you’re going along the journey and you’re butting your head against the wall and you’re getting frustrated because your body isn’t doing what you think that it should be doing, given your level of sacrifice. You want to ask yourself the questions, what am I willing to do? How much am I willing to sacrifice? You might be willing to do more, you might not be, and that’s okay. You get to decide that. Only you get to decide that.

But then, the next question is like, how much sacrifice am I willing to make? What things am I willing to take out of my diet? What am I willing to move around? Because sometimes all we have to do is rearrange our food. We’re eating the same things, but maybe we’re eating them in different portions.

And then, how difficult will it be for me to maintain that next level of body image that I want my body to be? Because it’s one thing to get there. It’s a totally different experience to maintain it. And so, again, what we need to do is we need to figure out what are you willing to do moving forward.

That’s all I have for you today. Have an amazing week, everyone. I’ll talk to you next time. Bye-bye.

Hey, Thanks for listening.

If you’re done with dieting and would like to work with me as your coach, I’d like to invite you to reach out to myself and my team to ask about programs and pricing. Go to elizabethsherman.com/contact to get started today. I can’t wait to hear from you. See you next week.